Saturday, 28 March 2009

Dear Mother Nature,

I really don't get you.

Humanity unites to vote in favour of your kingdom (the Earth)...

...and you prove to us that your clouds can hold more liquid than every living person's urinary bladders put together, plus an elephant's one too (just for the fun of it).

You ordered your minions to deploy rain - it was pouring cats and dogs and frogs!

You even go to the extent of flouncing nature's terrifyingly beautiful fireworks dozens upon dozens of times.

No, wait, I don't think you were fecklessly showing off.

I rephrase:

You even go to the extent of helping unwilling/undecided souls participate during Earth Hour, by kindly short-circuiting the electric supplies to their homes (therefore effectively offing their lights for 'em), with the help of the lightning from those cumulonimbus clouds of yours.

Too bad Tesco Extra had a backup power supply, eh?

I mean, you started lightning-ing homes to cut off their electricity (and blacking their houses out for 'em in conjunction with Earth Hour) even though there was a comfortable hour left before 8:30 p.m.

How kind of you.

Another one of your mercies (also to do with that lightning of yours) was to light up the sky (very momentarily though) with white flashes so the good people'd have some light while their houses remained dark.

But, uh, you do know that lightning's really dangerous to us bipeds, don't you?

One strike can send I-don't-know-what-the-exact-number-is-but-I-know-it's-very-very-big volts through a human. Deadly.

So, um, please tell your clouds not to aimlessly shoot their missiles at some ignorant pedestrian.


My point is: you just had to organise a lightning storm over Penang during Earth Hour.

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